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Fortune Cookie Fortune

2/7/2013

1 Comment

 
    I was out walking in the rain earlier and found a wet fortune from a fortune cookie on the sidewalk. Strangely, this happens to me more often than seems normal. I mean, I usually don't see people eating Chinese food on the street, especially in winter and the closest Chinese restaurant is 5 blocks away. It could be that people have fortunes in their pockets and when they pull out gloves or keys, the fortunes fall out too and then I find them. That is but one hypothesis among many and probably the most rational. The other guesses have to do with ideas about gigantic invisible fortune cookies that float like blimps in the sky etcetera, etcetera. 
    The fortune today read, "You are a bundle of energy, always on the go." What a shitty fortune. It's not even a fortune. I've noticed a steady decline in fortune cookie fortunes and it's rather unsettling to say the least. Fortune cookie fortunes are supposed to entice the recipient with something that will be, not something that already is unless it is a something one has forgotten and would do well to be reminded of. Here are some good fortunes: "You will receive a wonderful gift in the mail. You have a secret admirer. A great opportunity awaits." I don't even mind the ones that have little instructions often in the form of aphorisms like, "Don't count your chickens before they are hatched." or "Family is life's greatest treasure." Like most of us, there is usually not a time wherein I could not afford to reflect upon some timeless wisdom, but "You are a bundle of energy, always on the go?" Firstly, it wasn't true. I was not a bundle of energy this morning. I hadn't even had coffee yet. Secondly, what's with this "always on the go?" I hate that. I'm not always on the go. I decided that the fortune could use some editing. I crossed out- “a, bundle, of, on, the, and go.” Now my fortune reads, "You are energy, always." I feel much better. 
     There are treasures in the streets my friends, treasures in the streets.
1 Comment

    Barrie Cole
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